Brain transpant

Ok I 27 years old and I think I want a fucking brain transplant. I know your thinking that I must want a new brain but actually I think I'm relatively smart and would like to keep my current brain what I want is a new body. Its not that I dislike the way I look because that is really not the case. I more often than not dislike the way I feel. I seriously don't think there is a part of my body that doesn't really have something wrong with it. Currently my new pain is in my feet more specifically my heel. Now here's the thing. I don't normally complain about things that don't hurt that much, or don't hurt all the time. But my feet hurt all the damn time, which might not be such a problem if I didn't spend 8+ a day on my feet. Actually at work on Friday my feet hurt sooo bad that every time I stepped on my heel it sent shooting pains up my leg.
I was kinda hoping at the beginning of last week when they started to get really bad that all I would have to do was get a pedicure (which I still plan on doing mind you, who want to come with me), but I think that we're past the pedicure really curing my foot pain. Though I'm still hopeful. I did look up heel pain online and it turns out to be a kind of big deal. Something to do with over stretching the ligaments in my feet blah blah. All I really think if fuck My fucking ligaments causing me fucking pain again. Stupid ligaments I don't know why they just can't work like everyone Else's. Stupid feet suck cause you know if that is the problem their is no "cure" per say. I have to buy good supportive shoes (i.e. ugly shoes) which will look crazy with all my cute clothes. Which I know is terrible but its not even the worst part. The worst part is that it looks like, if that's my problem, that i not only have to wear ugly shoes, but I have to do exercises. Please lord no more exercises. Because telling me that I HAVE TO do it really makes me not want to do it. I have though been wearing better shoes. I seriously think it has something to do with this city since it seems I've had even more weird issues that normal since I moved back here. I would like to blame it on walking to the train etc. but I'll be real I only walk like half a block to the bus then take that to the train, then walk a half a block to my store. I am though on my feet for almost all 8 hours that I'm working. Which leads me to the question of what the hell I'm going to do if there really is something wrong with my feet. As most of my past doctors tend to frown upon my choice of careers I can't really imagine them being more excited now.
Oh well I know we all have our problems, but I be real all I really care about currently is mine because my fucking feet always hurt. On the plus side I did try to make an appointment I found another place where I can make an appointment online. We all know how much I like that. Now I'm just waiting for them to call me back. I'm sure you are all just dying to know whats wrong so I'll try to keep you posted.